The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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