He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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