thus making me awesome and them whores
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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