I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
