You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
COCAINE IS GR8
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize