sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
