There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
