Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
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