did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize