I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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