Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
