My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
