I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
