i don't like sucking hair
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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