Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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