David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
