theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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