you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
