suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
