I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I didn't notice because vodka
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Well I just put wine in my tea
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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