question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
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