That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize