is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Randomize