She said her name was "party"
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Randomize
