Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
