Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
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you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
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Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
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