This is not my ceiling
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
