I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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