Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
