ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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