I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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