oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
