If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
