I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
