dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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