So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize