I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Green mimosas i think yes
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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