maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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