PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Randomize
