was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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