Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
