And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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