Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
how does that bad decision feel?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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