YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
