so explain again why im purple
no
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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