i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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