Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
