Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
