the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Randomize
