"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize